Comments for Butchtastic

Comment on Suburban Butch Dad Report: a groom to be? by Inferno

Inferno — Sun, 19 Feb 2012 19:09:46 +0000

In my forties now and through my life I have had four serious relationships. They all crossed paths and at certain points I was in two serious relationships at once.
The first time it happened I ended up living in a triad situation under one roof for a very long time. Three adults and 4 children.
We discussed my divorcing of one person to married to the other so that we could all feel married together. We didn’t, but we all wanted married badly as one group. Eventually that all blew up anyway. 17 years with one and 4 with the other turned to dust.
That was 2 of my relationships. They were at once.
Now I am also in 2 relationships. I only live with one though as the other lives with another. We are cross dating each other. It is a weird dynamic, but it has been working for almost three years. They talk of poly marriage. One of them thinks it will be within the decade that a person can marry more than one and sex won’t matter. I doubt it, but it would be nice. It would help in so many ways for some people.

Comment on The sharp, sweet sting of Her love by Even Better « Uncommon Curiosity

Even Better « Uncommon Curiosity — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 18:44:36 +0000

[...] pulsing through our brains. He took all the thoughts and memories and conversation and wrote a post that’s even better at summing up subspace. Y’all should really go take a look, and [...]

Comment on Slow, hot fuck against the wall by harper

harper — Tue, 14 Feb 2012 03:31:12 +0000

DAMN! i shall definitely be stopping by here a little more often…

Thank you and welcome to my dirty little home on the web – K

Comment on Suburban Butch Dad Report: a groom to be? by Zoro

Zoro — Sat, 11 Feb 2012 03:53:43 +0000

When you stepped outside the safety of your sacred union, you opened yourself up to potential problems. Even though your spouse gave her blessings. Perhaps, on a perfect poly planet, you could commit to two people. But the responsibilities of young children, work, and a wife – are obviously tying you down. Sometimes, “you CAN’T have it BOTH ways.” It’s like that terrible tune: “Torn Between Two Lovers.”

There’s so much about this that rubs me the wrong way, it’s hard to know where to start. First, your superior, judgmental tone is not welcome. Second, characterizing my family as negative, ‘tying me down’, is off base. I love my family, I’m committed to my family, I choose to be with my family. Third, you suck for putting that song in my head. Fourth, if you came up to my wife and I and characterized our relationship as a ‘sacred union’, we’d most likely laugh right in your face. Don’t put religion on it, don’t put your belief system on it. And despite your false sympathy about how imperfect my poly planet is, I have committed to two people. That the legal system won’t recognize both commitments does not change the fact that I love and am devoted to both of my loves. That you clearly disapprove and/or are smugly happy to rub my nose in the challenges of my life, does nothing to dissuade me. Move along now… K

Comment on Suburban Butch Dad Report: a groom to be? by Katie B

Katie B — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 09:36:33 +0000

I know I don’t comment a lot and that this is only marginally related, but I had an experience over the holidays this year that really changed this subject for me.

I have a friend whom I have known since 1st grade. She was raised in a mainstream LDS (Mormon) household and was super active in the Church. She ended up going to BYU and staying to work in Provo for the LDS after graduation. Anyway, long story short, she came to meet some people interested in Fundamentalist Mormonism, had a genuine conversion experience and is now living in a Plural Marriage. Three wives, 12 children and counting the whole deal. Most of her family and all but one or two of her Mormon friends have completely disowned her. Heck, many of her non-Mormon friends (like me) have.

But we have been friends forever and I tried to “work around it” for a long time. That was until this last month when I spent a week with her family in suburban Salt Lake City. The fact is that this was one of the happiest families I had ever seen and certainly some of the most accepting and caring Mormons I have ever known. Both my husband and I walked away from our stay there believing that real marriage equality will be open to EVERYONE regardless or gender or number.

I know that polyamory and religion-based polygamy are very different, but I think the point is the same. Families are all different and all families need legal protection.
Period.

Comment on PSA: Why SOPA/PIPA screws the pootch for everyone by saemus

saemus — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 18:07:06 +0000

You know, if SOPA or any other “alleged” anti-piracy law passes, it means that only rich republicans and legislators will have pornography…man, that sucks!
Best,
s.

Comment on Butch Answers by Jamie

Jamie — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 12:50:08 +0000

Thank you for this. As a 42 year old queer woman I find that I occasionally realize something new about myself, and realizing that I am not necessarally butch but maybe gender-fluid is a recent realization.. reading stuff like this helps me. Thank you for that.

Comment on Butch Answers by Becca

Becca — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 06:37:24 +0000

I like being recognizably queer and gender binary non-conforming. I like walking into a queer bar and being recognized as queer. I don’t pass as straight, which is great, because I don’t want to. I also enjoy the appreciative looks I sometimes get from people who are attracted to butches and from other butches in recognition of what we have in common.

I am so envious of this that sometimes it borders on jealousy. I have a tendency to cling to my butch in queer spaces as a “see, see?! I’m queer too” fashion that is so not attractive.

I am butch, therefore everything I do is butch

Yes. This. I wish more butches would see it this way, that there isn’t a bar that they have to be -this- butch to ride the ride.

Comment on Butch Questions by butch

butch — Sun, 05 Feb 2012 19:09:26 +0000

What does it mean to you to be Butch?
It means I am a masculine woman.

Do you remember when you first heard the word Butch?
no

At what age did you identify as butch?
Your identity is who you are when you aren’t thinking about it, so I don’t believe it’s possible to consciously identify as something.

At what age did others identify you as butch?
See above.

Did other people identify you as butch before you identified yourself that way?
See above.

What are the most important things that a Butch must have?
self-respect

What are the most important things that a Butch must be?
willing to enforce self-chosen standards of good treatment and respect

What things do you *do* that you think aren’t butch?
Since I’m butch, whatever I’m doing being done by a butch, so…

What things do you *feel* that you think aren’t butch?
See above.

Who do you date? Butches, femmes, both, neither, straights, trans people, all of the above?
femmes

Who are your role models?
nobody

Is Butch a gender identity, an erotic expression, a way of life, a political position, or…?
a descriptive word

Did you ever fight identifying as butch?
yes

Have you ever been embarrassed or ashamed of your masculinity?
yes

Have you ever been ridiculed, threatened or harmed because of your masculinity?
yes

Do you ever wish that you weren’t butch?
no

What do you like about being butch?
I’ve decided to be myself, no matter the consequences.

What do you wish people knew about your butchness?
I’m just like this.

What do you wish people knew about butchness in general?
If that’s who you truly are, being butch is a good thing.

Do you like being butch?
yes

Do you like being different from the mainstream representation of what a woman “should” be?
I’m indifferent.

Anything else you’d like to share or comment on?
no

Comment on Microfantasy Monday, week 94: Training by LMueller

LMueller — Fri, 03 Feb 2012 19:54:58 +0000

Excellent!!