Category Archives: my selves

Now that I have Facial Hair, It’s Easier to Be Feminine

You might be looking at this post with a quizzical eye, maybe an eyebrow lift.  Or maybe you’ve been through all this and you’re nodding in recognition. It’s not something that happened right away, but as my appearance and voice … Continue reading

Posted in exploring gender, finding me, Genderqueer Transition, my selves, This Genderqueer LIfe | Tagged , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

“I need him”

“I need him, yes, really I do.” She’s motioned to a door I keep closed.  I narrow my eyes, wanting to believe her but not sure.  I keep that door closed for a reason.  I’ve only opened it once and … Continue reading

Posted in erotica, my selves | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

the whole of me

The me that you see is not the whole of me I’m looking out through these eyes longing for a wider view longing to be viewed to be seen for all you are good, bad, misguided, enlightened, lifted and low … Continue reading

Posted in finding me, my selves | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

Who am I?

I’ve been thinking about this question a lot lately. Yeah, more than usual.  A year ago that question and most answers centered around who I was in relationship to transition. Or who I was in relationship to relationships.  Today it’s … Continue reading

Posted in finding me, my selves, This Genderqueer LIfe | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

Imagining Myself Whole

This may end up being a bit rambly, so bear with me if you can. I had a therapy session recently.  We talked about my transition work which is all about coming out in my professional life these days.  We … Continue reading

Posted in butch/trans/genderqueer, Coming Out Genderqueer, finding me, genderqueer, my genderqueer life, my selves, The Therapy Chronicles, This Genderqueer LIfe, transgender | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Wishing I Was Better At This

Maybe it’s the hormones, maybe I’m mentally exhausted from NaNoWriMo month and stress at work.  Maybe it’s because I don’t get to see  my girlfriend until after the holidays and that makes it harder to feel generous about the time … Continue reading

Posted in my selves, relationships, The Therapy Chronicles | Tagged , , , , | 4 Comments

The Difficulty of Communicating Me

A conversation with my wife this morning, one in a series on gender identity and the binary, pointed a bright spotlight on an area of my personal identity journey my wife has serious issues with:  my male identity. OK, it’s … Continue reading

Posted in butch/trans/genderqueer, exploring gender, gender, gender non-conforming, genderqueer, my selves, non-conforming gender presentation | Tagged , , , , , | 5 Comments

Emotion by Committee

Somewhere deep inside, we gather in a cuddle huddle, hanging on to each other, weathering another emotional storm.  We’re all there, the littles and the bigs, the wise patient sad voices and the young idealistic ones, the solid citizens and … Continue reading

Posted in inner voice, my selves | Tagged , | 1 Comment

Genderqueer week(s) in review

A collection of gender related happenings in recent days and weeks. gender at work At the office, along with making magic happen with 1s and 0s, I’ve been involved in an agonizing process called:  get the next contract.  There have … Continue reading

Posted in anti-oppression work, bdsm, butch/trans/genderqueer, community, exploring gender, gender, gender non-conforming, my selves, parenting, slices of life, transgender | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Adolescence, over and over again

I’ve been thinking about adolescence today.  A while ago, I posted some thoughts about the idea of genderqueer transition — what does that even mean and what terms make sense to us as non-binarily gendered people? Today I was looking … Continue reading

Posted in exploring gender, finding me, gender, gender non-conforming, my selves | Tagged , , | 2 Comments