During my yoga practice this morning, we were thinking and meditating on how we spend our time and what ‘habits of frequency’ we engaged in as a part of our self-care and as a part of our involvement with those we love and our communities.
My thoughts tumbled around in my head and the word/intention that emerged was:
Commitment
As I often do when meditating, this thought started in the center of me and rippled outward.
What and who am I committed to with relation to myself? To my family? To my lovers? To my friends and community?
I am committed to caring for my body, this flesh container I was born into. I am committed to being generous and loving with myself, to being patient- even when it’s hard – with myself about habits and thought patterns I am not happy about having. I am committed to starting with myself when I think about who I am responsible for and to. I am devoted to the process of self-awareness and for becoming aware of my privilege and blind spots so that I might understand how those impact the way I walk in the world and how I might use my privilege to lift others up. I am committed to taking better care of my physical body, as it is the only one I have and it has, and continues to, serve me well. Without taking good care of myself, I cannot care for anyone the way I would like to.
I am committed to loving, nurturing and role-modeling for my daughters. It is important to me to model my values and to support them as they work toward self-reliance and self-determination. My goal is that they become responsible, caring adults who take responsibility for their own actions and also, for doing the work required to make the world a place they want to live in. I am committed to being available to them for focused attention and to bear witness to their triumphs and struggles.
I am committed to my wife, my companion and partner for 21 years and counting. I am devoted to the family and home we have created, to being a partner in the endeavor of continuing to build a strong and loving home together. I am committed to giving her focused attention and to be a witness to her commitment and hard work, and to be a loving and generous ear to her struggles and dreams. I want to build on our successes, learn from our failures and always move forward with best intent.
I am committed to my girlfriend, my new love, the new fire in my heart. Oregon Girl went from a hot ember to a steady flame very quickly and yet it feels as though she’s always been in my heart, waiting for me to discover her. I am committed to the intentional, authentic and open-hearted relationship we are building together. I am devoted to my role as her lover, her boyfriend and her friend. In each of those capacities, I will offer positive, constructive and loving energy. I am also committed to being my most real, authentic self, allowing myself to be vulnerable and to let her in to my deepest core spaces.
I am committed to my lover, the strong, warm and comfortable Hippy Goddess, who envelopes me with a sense of solidity and acceptance. I will continue to look for ways we can spend time together, despite the challenges our schedules sometimes pose. I am devoted to being a friend who is a lover, making space to bear witness to her struggles and triumphs, the ways life brings joy and hardship. I will make time for hugs and snuggles to aid in her healing process.
I am committed to close friends, friends I’ve known for years and some who are have only recently entered my life. I am committed to spending time with them, bringing them together or joining their gatherings. I am continually delighted and fulfilled by the various talents and energies and lessons my friends bring into my life.
I am committed to my community, to bearing witness to the hardships others face even while I live comfortably. To always seek ways in which I can bring joy and comfort to someone else’s life, preferring to do so one-on-one but accepting that sometimes I will contribute to larger causes. I am committed to living intentionally, to always looking for how I can improve my positive impact and lessen my negative footprint on my neighborhood, city, state, country, world. I will hold myself accountable for my actions and cultivate humility in myself. I will endeavor to come up with solutions and positive ways to address issues rather than focus on blame.
I am committed to being a better person tomorrow than I was yesterday. Some of the ways I will accomplish this will be internal, many will be acted out externally, in my interactions with the people in my life. I am committed to making those interactions as positively impactful as possible.
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You are beautiful, inside and out.