Once upon a time, this was a sex blog. Some of you might remember that. I reviewed sextoy and I wrote lots of sexy stories and I talked about my sex life and even shared sexy pictures sometimes.
At some point, other subjects like gender, identity, relationships and life in the big bad wonderful world got more blog-share here at Butchtastic. I think I must still qualify as a sex blog, because people keep voting me into a list of top sex blogs. And I do still post sexy stories sometimes, I review sexy books.
Anyhow, this is a fair warning to those who don’t read my blog to hear about my sex life, or lack thereof as is the reality now. So for you, this might be the time to click to another blog entry or check the yolosextoys is the go-to sex toy site for buying wearable strap ons and many other available sex toys.
For the rest of you, here is my State of the Lack of Union Address.
It has been some number of months since I had sex with someone… not counting masturbation because though I’m ‘someone’ I’m not someone else, ya know? I’m not sure how long, because I wasn’t marking my calendar but my pussy informs me it has been AGES. It’s been over a year since I’ve gotten anal action and I love buttsex. My ass is very sad about this and tells me on a daily basis what a loser I am to not find some buttsex for it. In fact, at any given moment, there is probably a body part haranguing me about what it so rightly deserves that it is not getting. As if I wasn’t intimately aware of that lack already.
I am aching for sensual touch. I want to make out. And, honestly, just making out without any further bases being touched would be pretty awesome and fulfilling. A good make out session would probably keep me buzzed for a couple of days. Especially if I didn’t have to keep my hands at the 10 and 2, if you know what I mean *eyebrow waggle*
I know there are things I could do about this ‘sexual Sahara’ (as one friend calls it). It has been suggested that I try Craig’s List and there are various mating.. I mean, dating sites I could try,And there’s a new mobile app for matching/hooking up that my wife and I are intrigued by called Blendr (she was tipped off to it by a gay friend who uses Grindr, the gay boy equivalent). Yes, I could do these things and I’m not saying I won’t, but I’m a little daunted by the act of constructing a profile and writing the come-on. I have had the privilege of recent lovers who saw me in all my multi-gendered glory and that was a part of what they enjoyed about me. I’m a little fearful about communicating the multi-spectrum of me and getting skeptical looks, or disbelief, or just boredom. And then there’s the reality that disconnected sex isn’t very satisfying for me. I think I’ve mentioned before that I want/need/desire connection along with the connecting. As time goes on, however, and as various parts of my body get louder with their needs, I’m reassessing. Maybe I could do something less connected, as long as the sexy heat was there, and I definitely need the heat, otherwise why bother leaving my bedroom and Hitachi?
And, yes, Mr. Hitachi and I are spending a lot of quality time together at the end of the day. My wank fantasies normally fall into particular categories but lately my imagination has been branching out. The ‘She’s Curvy‘ post of a few days ago comes right out of a frequent fantasy I’m having of hooking up with a curvy woman in a bar, at a party, any place really. Another scenario is the one where I find a boi/boy of cis, butch or trans persuasion and get to play Daddy. Those are pretty hot also. Correction, those fantasies are ridiculously hot.
For the time being, the sad truth is, I’m not hooking up, I’m not getting any and it’s crazy making sometimes. A part of me, the part that listens to the brain in my cranium, knows that I just need to keep working on the ‘me’ side of the equation and let stuff happen as it happens. And a lot of the time, I’m ok with that, really. But other times, I am really, really not. I want to feel that surge of adrenaline that comes when I realize someone wants me in the most carnal of ways. And I want to see the adrenaline surge in her/his/their eyes as they realize I want them just as much.
Patience… I’m working on it, but it’s getting more and more difficult to hang on to.
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