What’s Kyle Doing?

What am I up to, you ask?  There’s always plenty going on, here are a few of the items that are getting my attention and time lately:

  • Writing up session proposals for Gender Odyssey.  One is called Wanted: Your Stories, part writing workshop, part call to action aimed to pull in non-writers as well as writers.  The focus of the session is not specific writing skills, but instead is about encouraging people to get their personal life stories out into the world.  The second is called Gender Aware Parenting and will be a facilitated discussion about various topics of interest to trans and gender non-conforming parents and their partners.  Topics like becoming a parent (many methods are available), parenting in a gender and sexuality aware way, communicating with your kids, their friends and their friends parents about your gender.  Stuff like that.
  • The Seattle Erotic Arts Festival has put out its call for submissions and I am going to submit something(s) for the Literary Exhibit.  The first topic that came to mind  is writing about the first time I had sex with a girl.
  • I have planned a writing retreat for myself.   I’ll be going out to the Washington coast, Long Beach Peninsula to be specific, staying in a cabin by myself all weekend.  Well, by myself and my laptop, some selected books and notes.  I plan to work on my novel, go for walks and meditations on the beach, take lots of pictures and find out how it is to be by myself for more than a few hours.  I haven’t gone off by myself like this in about 12 years, so I am excited and slightly nervous.
  • My family is doing very well, now that we seem to have kicked the latest round of death-warmed-over flu.  My wife and I have been having some great conversations lately, in no small part because I’m opening up to her about a lot of stuff going on with me, stuff I wasn’t ready to talk about before.  She’s been supportive, encouraging and we’re getting along pretty well.  My Elder Spawn is 13, a seventh grader and very much steeped in teenagerdom.  She reads voraciously, mostly fantasy, some sci/fi.  She is also a huge manga/anime fan and she watches anime on her computer somewhat obsessively.  Current favorite:  Naruto.  She briefly had a boyfriend, another seventh grader living in the neighborhood, but they’ve broken up.  She’s OK though, he was very gracious in explaining that he wasn’t ready to be in a relationship just yet.   Our Smaller Person is 3 1/2 and fully exploiting her developmental stage in order to make her moms crazy.  When she is delightful and sweet, she is the epitome of those characteristics, when she is defiant and awful, run for cover.  She is creative, can write her name, loves books and playing games on a tablet computer and watching cartoons.  She is potty trained, sleeps in her own bed most nights and we’ve just started the final stages of weaning… and she is one of the cutest human beings I know.
  • My newest favorite toy is my Kindle.  I have tech books and erotic fiction and self-help stuff on there and I love how portable those books are now.  I also love having access to TV shows I never had a chance to watch, like Firefly.  And now I know why people were so upset when it was cancelled.  Fucking love that show, love the characters and the ‘verse they exist in.  Love my Kindle.
  • I finally finished reading Stone Butch Blues and I have so many thoughts about it, there are some blog posts brewing up in my brain pan.  One of those thoughts is around the mentoring that the older butches – bulls – did for the younger ones.  I have not had that experience.  When I was a young butch, there weren’t old butches anywhere within sight.  I know now they were out there in the community, but I didn’t know where to look.  Actually, at the time, I didn’t know to look.  I think about my friendship with Nic, who is nearly 20 years my junior.  I’m not an old school bull like those in SBB, but there are times when I can lend some of my experience to him and that feels pretty good.  On the other hand, I’m learning a ton from Nic as well, so I’d say the mentoring works both ways.  Anyhow, that aspect of the book got me thinking about my local community and the lack of butch community, the lack of a gathering place where older and younger butches gather to learn from, and support, each other.
  • I’m reading my way through Butch is a Noun, by S. Bear Bergman as well as Opening Up, a book on polyamorous relationships lent to me by Neighbor Femme.  On my Kindle, I’m reading Rye, a novel by Sam Rosenthal where the main characters are genderqueer, poly and kinky.  I’m reading it for review, so watch for that if you’re curious.  Also on my Kindle, Daring Greatly by Brene Brown, which is having a big impact on my internal dialog and beginning to effect the way I move in the world.  I started reading it because Wendi Kali raved about it, and I knew enough about Wendi to think that if she liked it, I probably would to.  Once I got into it, I realized that I’d been getting ready to read it all summer.  This book is giving me vocabulary and structure for a lot of my internal shitstorm, which is in turn helping me calm that storm.  As a result, I’m looking into therapy for the first time in years and I really think it’s going to be a good thing, I’m definitely ready for it.

So that’s a lot of what’s going on.  Also, working every day for moolah.  Also, hoping I’m healthy soon so I can get back to bike commuting.  Also, pondering what kind of sexual future I want to have and how to make that happen.  Also, spring is coming and that means working in the yard and planting my garden. Also… also… yeah, yeah, all that.

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