Matt Kaily (Tranifesto) has a feature on his blog called ‘Ask Matt’. He is a great educator, and his answers are always thoughtful and well written. The one I’m referring to answers a question by a sophomore in high school who identifies as genderqueer and prefers to go by gender neutral pronouns (Gender Neutral Pronouns Presenting a Problem).
In his response, Kaily acknowledges that gender neutral pronouns are hard to work with and become accustomed to — even if you’re trans*, genderqueer or an ally for the community. Because of that he suggests some patience, but also firmness of resolve. He suggests working one-on-one with people, explaining the importance of respecting pronoun choice.
Gender neutral pronouns are challenging, I’m not perfect at them even though I’ve been working on this for a while. I have been selectively stating a preference for they/them pronouns and I have some friends who also prefer them. I still mess up sometimes. Point being, it’s a challenge, but something I have taken on out of respect for others.
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