Kicking Myself

Seems lately like I can handle the big challenges life throws my way but it’s the little things, the unexpected, stub-your-toe-in-the-dark things that are taking me out at the knees.

For example, this morning I came to my computer and found out it had re-booted.  Apparently, it needed to do updates and I had it set to do so automatically.  (curses self for not checking that setting after the OS upgrade).  That in itself is just an inconvenience, requiring me to open some apps that I had up last night.  What almost made me cry was the empty paint.exe window staring at me with a mocking expression and a nya-nya-nya.  You see, last night and for several days now, that application was hosting a picture of my beloved.  I grabbed a screen-shot of her from the webcam.  It was a sweet, un-posed, un-self-conscious picture and I loved it.  And now it’s gone.

Yeah, I hadn’t saved it yet, figured I had time.  (kicks self, repeatedly)

Things like this aren’t earth shattering, they don’t materially make life harder, but they feel like a blow to my heart.  For now, I have that picture securely taped to the inside of my eyelids, available whenever I want to gaze at it, sighing, like a love-lorn schoolboy.   For later, I had better damned well remember to save the screenshot next time or I’ll do more than kick myself.

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