Has it only been two years?

Roxy and I are closing in on the two year anniversary of when we met on twitter.  The other day, I said something about our ‘three years together’ and she laughed and gently reminded me it’s only been two.  But it feels like I’ve known her all my life, feels like I’ve loved her forever.

Today is another anniversary, we’re celebrating a year since making a more formal commitment to each other.  We were in a New York hotel room, it was the weekend of last year’s New York Sex Bloggers Calendar party.  We’d had a rough time for several months, working through conflicts and heart breaks, and miscommunication.  The New York trip was our chance to be together, physically, and to reconfirm our intentions to stay together as a long-distance couple.  We’d each brought some rope, I’d written some vows for us to say together.  We sat, with hands clasped, and with our hearts and minds as witnesses, and said those words to each other as we wound the rope around our hands.  She’s posted a picture from the ceremony on her blog today.

We cried, we smiled like goofy kids, we kissed, we celebrated in the wonderfully carnal way we love.  We didn’t have any illusions that our road would be easy, or that we wouldn’t face new and difficult challenges along the way.  The difference was, from that moment forward, we had a sense of permanence, of standing in the center of the storm together, of getting through the fire, together.  And believe me, there are plenty of storms and walls of fire threatening us as a couple.  We didn’t choose the “easy” road to couple-dom, but there aren’t any easy roads for us.  We chose to make a commitment to each other, recognizing that there would be challenges and misunderstandings.  And I believe both of us recognize that these challenges and misunderstandings, when handled with love and determination, can be the events that strengthen us as a couple and fuel our growth as individuals.  That’s been proven over and over again, in the two years we’ve been loving each other.

This is a quote from our vows.  We said these words to each other, to put the final seal on our commitment.  I don’t often remember them verbatim, but I remember the feeling, the intention, the love and the sense of strength that had grown between us:


Never will I seek to do you harm; always will I strive for your happiness and welfare. My love will be your treasure in the times when other riches fail to serve. My love will be your medicine in sickness as my hand tends your needs. My love will be your mirth when your heart is touched by sadness. My love will be your shining star through the darkest of nights. My love will be your banquet when life’s table seems empty. All this do I promise you with all the love that is in my heart. So mote it be.

My love, now do I make my promises to you. I promise to share laughter in times of joy and wonder; to share tears when sorrow touches our lives; to share my dreams and hopes, that our love and minds may grow; to share compassion and understanding during times of frustration and anger; to share all that I have, and all that I am, for as long as love shall last.


It’s been a year since that night, but every day we find a way to recognize those promises and renew those vows.  This is the way love should be, don’t you agree?

Happy anniversary, sweet woman. May my love be a blessing to you always. My heart reaches for yours every moment of every day.  Finding and loving you is one of the very best things to ever happen to me.  Thank you for being so good to me.

.. until the stars fall down, my love, every one of them.

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