Come on people! FFG needs a Butch!

My good friend, FemmeFairyGodmother (FemmFairyGodMom on twitter) is in need of a butch, but not any butch.  No, this woman has standards (but hey, don’t they all?).   She posted about her quest yesterday.

What this woman has to offer:  sexy, smart, tall, beautiful, great cook, funny, great writer..

What she’s looking for:

Butch… wait… more than that,  Very Very Butch…  hmmm….. Very Very Tall Butch..  Ok, I think we need to see what FFG says in her post, before I get it all wrong:

I’m a femme. A femme who dates butches. Generally, the more butch of the butch.

I like the Alpha Wolf. Don’t bother me with alpha dogs. Dogs are domesticated and even so-called alphas can be dominated by a strong femme. Nope. I want the Alpha Wolf, the one who is in charge, the one who growls at me both in pleasure and in frustration. I like aggressive, I like strong.

I’m 5’8” barefoot, as tall as 6’ depending on what shoes I wear. I really like tall butches. At least as tall as I am.

And there’s more, about being handy and smart and funny and you can read the rest in her post.  I’ve got some stuff to add, stuff I think you should know if you’re gonna take your Alpha Wolf self over to blow down her door.  I’d suggest you attempt some courting.  Don’t just march in there like a bulldyke in a china shop.  Woo her, show her that along with strong, you can be gentle and sensitive.  I know, some of you figure the whole Alpha Wolf, Mega-Butch requirement means she’d like you to swagger in with your club and drag her off to your cave.  I’m gonna stick my neck out right now and say, I think you should try to charm her into your Den of Love instead.

Also, I happen to know that if you’re an uber-butch who can cook and/or bake, you will find your way into her heart (and panties) with even greater speed.  And, ya know what, if  you can’t cook, offer to help clean up.   Also, do not take lightly her mention of bat removal.  She is dead, golldarned serious about that.  If you are going to wimp out on her in her moment of need, don’t bother.

Most of all, if you’re gonna try to court and flirt and swagger your way into this woman’s heart, remember she has friends.  And we won’t take to kindly to any heartbreakin activity, ya’hear?

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4 Responses to Come on people! FFG needs a Butch!

  1. Roxy says:

    Look at you hookin’ up your friends…and doing it in such a sexy, funny way. You are made of awesome sauce, lover.

    FFG is such a wonderful person and she deserves the best. Thanks for being a good friend and helping her out – I’d love to see her get a few happy endings of her own.

  2. Aw, Kyle. Thank you! 😉 You, to Roxy. Y’all are so sweet to me. Thanks.

  3. saintchick says:

    OMG can you please write my next craigslist ad, that would be most awesome !!!!! 😉

  4. kimber says:

    well said. having known said femme for quite a long time – though only ever online, sadly – I think this is the perfect intro for prospective interests. *smile*
    every girl should have such friends!
    ~k

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