And the winner is….

The winner of the Vibrator Horror Story Contest, sponsored by Tabu Toys, is

Pepper Honeywood

The winning entry, chosen by a randomizer:

My horror stories are pretty mild, but I DO need a Hitachi because my sister stole mine.

I suppose you could count the time BEFORE I had a sex toy. I was a teenager and just learning about masturbation, and every household object had potential in my eyes…so I once used a carrot as a dildo. Classic, right?

I hid the carrot in my sock drawer afterward, lest anyone ask questions or try to cook it for supper, and forgot about it. When I found it again a couple of weeks later, it was completely shriveled up. In my irrational teenage mind I concluded that my vagina was toxic and had killed it, and I threw it into the backyard to conceal my guilt.

Also, like others, the Rabbit did not work for me because my PC muscles were too strong. Stupidly, I tried to send it back.

My favorite  story, one of the ones that made me laugh out loud and cringe at the same time, was this one from Katie:

My Vibrator horror story goes along the lines of “Why you never buy the cheapest dildo/vibrator in the sex shop” stories.

Me and my guy were in the first year of our relationship, and broke but horny decided to start looking at toys for fulfilling my double penetration fantasy. Sadly since neither of us had any experience with any store bought vibrator/dildos we just decided to get the cheapest one there, which turned out to be an eight inch, HARD plastic, $10 contraption, roughly the shape of a bottle of shampoo.

Lube didn’t work on it, and it felt as if I was masturbating with a vibrating, overheated, shaved barbie doll. Even with this issue we still wanted to get some use out of the toy so my boy tried to start my fantasy but before he could get his dick close to the backdoor the vibrator slid out and stabbed him in the stomach breaking off the cap that held the batteries in and out comes a C battery avalanche down upon his cock and ball.

This caused him to collapse on top of me stabbing himself in the stomach AGAIN and causing the device to stab back into me and try to make me a new hole. Which then somehow caused a giant crack to form down the side of it.

It was thrown away 5 minutes later after the pain subsided. The only thing we saved were the batteries.

And then we broke down the next pay check to buy a well researched(though more expensive) vibrator that worked like a dream.

Thanks again to Tabu Toys, who suggested and sponsored this contest, I appreciate your support and your excellent customer service. Also, a big thanks to all who participated and exposed yourselves for our amusement, you are all awesome.  And kudos to Mrs. Kyle for coming up with such an excellent and entertaining contest idea.

This content is published under the Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 Unported license.

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