So much of the time I come to this entry screen to moan and groan about how hard life is but today I want to revel in the awesomeness I’m experiencing lately. I want to roll around in it and get the smell all over me.
What’s new and awesome? Everything.
But you want specifics:
I’m slowing down, settling in, quality over quantity.
Recently, it came to me that I needed to slow it down, that I was acting like I was on the continuous hunt and not appreciating what I already had in my life. Or, more specifically, who I had in my life. Over the course of about a week, this idea crystallized and I came up with an action plan: step out of the hunt and concentrate on the relationships I am currently in, putting my focus and energy into those people rather than continually scanning the horizon for the next interesting person to come along.
Quality is my new way of being, over quantity. This means I’ve been saying ‘no’ to some opportunities lately, and not just because I want to focus my romantic energies, but because I need to focus my energies period. Too often, I stack events one after the other without down time in between. Down time is important for refilling my bucket energetically, and also so I can integrate and ponder the experiences I’m having. When I don’t take enough time around events, I get tired, sick, grumpy and not fun to be around.
Along with saying ‘no’ to additional connections, I have had the pleasure of saying ‘yes’. I said ‘yes’ to a woman who lives in my neighborhood who I’ve been dating for a while now and ‘yes’ to a someone I’ve been hoping to connect with who lives a bit farther away. Along with those two lovely lovers, I’m focusing more energy on my family, giving more time and attention to my wife and kids.
I’m going to call my neighbor Hippy Goddess because she will smile and shake her head at me. She’s tall and powerful and sexy and knows some serious sex magic. I love being able to stop by her house and ask her out on spontaneous lunch dates. She and I have known of each other for over 10 years, as people living within the queer community here, but just during this year, we’ve really gotten to know each other. And we like what we’ve gotten to know. She’s definitely a keeper.
And then there’s the Oregon Girl, who lives to the south of me, too far for spontaneous visits but not too far to plan a lot of adventures together. We’ve been to her family cabin in Oregon and to the Olympic Club in Centralia. We have tickets to the Shawn Mullins show in Seattle in October and plans to get together later in September as well. We are having a wonderfully flirtatious affair via the internet. Thank goodness for the internet. She’s someone I’ve been interested in for quite some time but couldn’t court because of her relationship situation. Since that has opened up, I’ve been able to show her more of the real me, to excellent results. OG is a big reason I’ve decided to get real and settle down into the relationships I had rather than be perpetually on the hunt. She invited me to swim in the deep end. I really like being in the deep end with her, she makes me think, tells great stories and gets me fired up in so many ways.
For those of you following from home, you might be wondering, “What about your Sweetheart in Seattle?” She has decided to pursue monogamy with someone else and I wish her well in that pursuit. I love her dearly and always will.
So now y’all are caught up with me… I have Gender Odyssey this weekend and I’ll be doing all the things and leading two workshops and participating in another and getting filmed for a documentary. I’m hoping that once I get back, I can settle back into another of my loves… writing. See you later.
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